These are difficult days. There is a rift in this country that is far too deep and wide for a politician to sew up.
These are difficult days. I have many people in my life on extremes of topics and discussions. I have some that act as though they are neutral. I haven't figured out which is worse. These are difficult days. I see many people speaking out in ways they shouldn't. I want to yell and scream, but I know that it will cause a greater divide. These are difficult days. I see others not speaking out, when they should be the ones to do so. I have a great deal I'd like to say, but the people that need to hear it are not ready to receive it. For now, if you view my silence, do not take it for me having nothing to say. Instead, view it as me taking my time to formulate and articulate the best set of words that will touch the most lives. There is work I'm doing that isn't being seen just yet. I hope to share it soon.
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On Memorial Day, we had friends over for a cookout. It was not a Memorial Day cookout as much as it was a farewell to friends. My mother decided to invite herself because "I like them too."
Okay, whatever. So there we were, chatting away. And as one person finishes a funny story, my mother says, "I could tell a story, but I won't." This has happened for my entire life. It appears that my mother's goal is to continually try to embarrass me, or hold stories over my head. It seems like a power play from where I stand. Because, let's face it, why would a parent want to embarrass their child (of any age) for the fun of it? Over. And over. And over. For some reason she didn't tell the story. I have my theories. Either she realized it's the wrong thing to do or she finally remembered. Her favorite, most embarrassing stories of me actually stem from horrible things that were done TO me that caused my response. Regardless of why she chose to not share, what was the purpose of saying, "I could tell a story, but I won't." It honestly is her trying to jab me one more time. I know your secrets. I could hurt you. I ignore it for the most part because I'm tired of the crap. It brings it on more. When you push back, they lay it on further. I think this is a petty example of the culture of America these days. I have had loving Christians say that there is nothing wrong with Confederate flag. It's a part of history. Because, after all, the Civil War was fought for more than just slavery. Ya know, after research and years tutoring and teaching, I agree with part of that. The Civil War did have more elements to it than just slavery. But I want to point out, that the slavery was the major issue because it involved directly the treatment of human beings. The Confederate flag may stand for more than just what side of the Civil War's stance on slavery was. However, it's a constant reminder to the black community of the major point of the war. The confederate flag is like my mother stating, "I could tell a story, but I won't." We live in a society where power wins. Those that are humble get mistaken for weak. And those searching for their next high of taking advantage of the little guy will take it. We don't need the reminders of evil in our midst. We need the reminder of Good. The pure goodness from the pure God. We will not be fixed until the world finds the Prince of Peace. Until then, those of us that know him, must show him and live lives that reflect him. It's the only way we will come out of this. Wave the flag of freedom. I'm not referring to the American flag, but to the flag of God. Show the Holy Spirit lives. We need him. A week and a half ago we hosted our friends for a little cookout. They were heading away to move to the mountains and we needed a chance to say goodbye.
While we were catching up, my friend was telling me about her daughter and things going on with her. The sweet daughter had just finished a year long program to fill in that "gap year" that kids take while attempting to figure out what they would like to do with their lives after high school. It was an incredible experience for her, so much so that she is returning to the facility as a employee this year! Each student that goes there must work through some issues they have to grow into a more productive human, if you will. (For my friend's daughter, I think she just needed to learn to love herself for how wonderful she is, but don't tell anyone.) One girl there struggled with depression. The group had to work there way through how to be in someone's life during hard times. This one girl is the reason for this story. As my friend was discussing her daughter's time away, she told me about a more recent interaction. All of the students had created a group chat to keep in touch. One girl had said something and my friend's daughter replied with, "You're so cute" or something like that. (Since she is one of my few readers, she can correct it in the comments if she so chooses.) The girl dealing with depression chimes in with, "So what? The rest of us are all ugly?" Now, any rational adult rolls their eyes and says, "Oh please! She never said that!" Why is that? As we know, just because you compliment someone, does not mean that you insult another. I know, here and now, that God gave me that story on Monday afternoon to better grasp what is happening in our country. Because a few short hours after hearing that story, George Floyd was murdered. With the publishing of that story, the Black Lives Matter movement gained a great deal more push. Let's see how these stories relate. In 2014, another black man was killed by an officer. That is when Black Lives Matter took root in American culture. If you know me, you know I'm the least racist person ever, well, at least that's what my dating history says. And yet, when they shouted, "Black Lives Matter!" I responded with "All Lives Matter." I was thinking that I was being more inclusive. Black, White, Latino, Jewish, Swedish, Ugandan, Irish, you name it, it matters! Though there has been great tragedy, I'm thankful to admit to you that I have grown since 2014. I have seen the error of my ways. Even though in essence I felt I was being inclusive of all people, I was taking away from what it meant. While they were saying, "You're so cute," I was saying, "So everyone else is ugly?" I was naive. I thought I was joining not just my black brothers and sisters, but also my Arabian, English, Russian, and Italian. Saying that black lives matter does not take away from any other race, in this country or any other. We're simply trying to tell those around us that they do in fact matter, and things still are not equal. There is a cartoon video going around discussing systemic racism. I encourage anyone on the fence or confused to watch it. You can find it on Facebook from the page "NowThis Politics." I happened upon it and watched it wondering if it would be a good tool for my children (which it is). As I watched, I realized that my son and I had already gone through this lesson two February's ago. If you have the chance, I encourage you to read the book, "Separate, but NOT Equal" by Jim Haskins. It was published by Scholastic and is intended for children. The problem is that too many adults were never truly taught about the social injustice. We learned of the Civil War and the official end of slavery. We learned about the Civil Rights Movement. However, our history books never taught me about redlining communities. We knew that there was a "right side of the tracks" and a "wrong side of the tracks," but nobody ever taught us that it was actually the government that set up those sides of the tracks and made it nearly impossible to make both sides of the tracks "right". This is a time for all of us to learn and grow. And in our growth, we can bring change. We can finally make things right. Please know that I am aware that there are black people that will still choose to make mistakes. I know that given the opportunity, some won't take the chance to make it. But I also know that those "chances" are rarely given. I know that there are no people group of any race, religion, nation, political side that hasn't made mistakes. But we must make a stand. We must fight together for the rights of all people. I want my children to grow up in a world that changed the course of history while they were alive. It starts with us. It starts today. What will you do to help? |
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