There are so many things I want to say about kids and parenting. I know I'm not a professional, by educational standards, but I think I've done a pretty good job with my two. So this is something I've come across and love to share.
Our children our little versions of us. Well, they are if we are with them through life. Everyone tells us their little brains are like sponges soaking everything in. And boy is it true. My son was the most well mannered, polite little boy on the planet. He received compliments from everyone. Then school happened. He picked up the worst attitude that I have ever seen. People turned heads and were in shock by the words and attitude behind them. It was scary. But after a week or two he returned to his normal self of the sweet, kind, respectful child I knew and loved - and taught, raised, worked on! They absorb so much around them. We all know of some story where 'Lil Billy said a bad word. He didn't know it was bad because Daddy says it at the TV when the football game is on. There's a story for almost every child in every family. Maybe it wasn't a four letter word, but a sassy pants attitude toward Daddy because Mommy said it to her friend. Who knows. But it shows us just how much those kids want to be like us, doesn't it. That isn't a bad thing. For one, it makes us step up our game. We watch what we say and how we say it when those feet are pitter pattering by our side. It's great to have accountability. It also allows us to show them, and instill in them, the right things. There are three major things that I work to instill in my children. Although it is often bothersome to have them around while I'm doing these three things, I know it is a great way to show them the importance of them. So here are my three bigs to make active in my children. 1st Place: Spiritual walk. Y'all know where I stand. If you're new here and don't know, I am a follower of Christ. A Christian - despite all the negativity that makes it to the news that word is not so terrible. A Christian is supposed to fall in line with exactly what I'm talking about. Christian means little Christ. We are to show Christ, Jesus, to those around us. We mimic as a child mimics us. My children know that when I am having my quiet time, it means I am reading my Bible, praying, journaling, spending time with the Lord. They are allowed to join me in that time, as long as they are following suit. I have watched both children run and grab Bibles to read and underline passages, just as I am doing in that time. We pray together. We talk about the Christian life together (one of the best things about walking Caleb to school). If they are going to mimic me, I want it to be in this area first and foremost. Tied for 2nd: Exercise. Come on, you knew this was coming. I'm a personal trainer. I continually try to implement family exercise/fitness activities. They are allowed to workout while I am working out or when I have clients, as long as the adults get first choice of equipment and space. I know that they know that being active is important to their health. They see me outside working and know that they need to as well. Tied for 2nd: Education. Okay, seriously, I'm a writer, former educator, tutor. These are just rolling off. When the kids see me, or my husband, reading, it shows them we value reading. They see me writing and they love to write. They know that we are teachers, and therefor want to be our favorite students. And they are. They work hard because they know we will celebrate them, and because they realize that they too will be well educated. Kids are who we make them to be. They will follow whoever they can, why not have them follow you? If you aren't proud of the person you are, then maybe you should work on yourself, and let them see it. Let them see how you improve. My children have watched me lose 60 pounds of baby weight. They have watched me read rejection letters from publishers. They have seen me cry, laugh, sing, fall, and rise again. There are negative things that they have picked up from me, but it has helped me change myself for the better. And I will always be changing to better myself for them, for me, and for whoever else is following.
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Okay, I’m going to be honest here. What is going on with my Christian facebook friends these days? I am struggling to understand some of the things they say. I’m going to give you my top three “What?” phrases, links, etc. that I just cannot get past. If I offend you I want you to know, I am not sorry. This might just be what you need to read. This list is not in any specific order.
Number 1: Christian Karma – “It’s ok, what goes around comes around. Karma baby.” No. That isn’t what happens, and you should know that if you are following Christ. Karma is actually from Hinduism and Buddhism. It is the sum of a person’s actions in this and previous lives which will then decide what their future life will be. So when you say, “what goes around comes around,” you’re really saying, “they were a jerk to me yesterday so when they die they will become and earthworm.” Let’s get away from why this whole Christian Karma thing is wrong, and make some corrections to the thinking. God blesses the least, that isn’t Karma, that is grace, benevolence, love. Christians will struggle for the sake of Christ. That doesn’t mean that someone else is going to get theirs later on because they persecuted you. What it does mean is that God sees and knows your suffering and will offer peace and a heavenly retribution at the end of times. We know from Psalms that God does indeed fight for us. So at the very least, we can say, “God will take care of my enemies.” But to think that God and Karma are teaming up to beat up that guy who cut you off in the WalMart parking lot? No. I’m pretty sure the God of all is not sitting with a multi-armed elephant telling it what to make us when we pass. But if think so, you are not a follower of Christ. Number 2: Good Vibes and Good Thoughts This one I see far too often. It’s finals time, new job opportunity, or doctor’s appointments and here are people dropping it on Facebook. “Hey guys could you pray, send good vibes or good thoughts for me…” Oh good heavens people. I’ve actually read on one person’s post, “whichever you do…” At least that person didn’t claim Christianity. However when my youth pastor “friend” posted that he was worried about his final and asked for prayers, good vibes and good thoughts I was about to lose it. At least the non-Christian was right. You have to pick one. Either you believe in the power of prayer or you don’t. Plain and simple. Don’t start meshing together the things of God and the things of the world. When you claim Christ, than you must do so in an all or nothing way. You are either for God or against him. Remember in Revelation 3:15-16, Jesus speaks to the church of Laodicea saying that because they are neither hot nor cold, they would be spit out from His mouth. You have to choose, one way or the other. There’s no dancing between the two. Here, let me send you some vibes. Got ‘em? Feeling better? How about my thoughts. Oh, please. How often did you think of that classmate in middle school that you wanted to date? You can think something about someone all day and night, doesn’t mean anything is going to happen. We’re too worried about offending those that don’t pray, but if you believe in Christ, you must believe in prayer. Prayer will do more than good vibes or happy thoughts could ever do. And isn’t it better to offend someone who doesn’t believe than offend God? Number 3: What’s your sign? Okay, guys. Seriously? Do we need a history lesson in horoscopes, signs, and other paganistic items? When I see a Christian post about their horoscope I really have to wonder- did they do it as a joke? But then I stop and think, how would they have known to post it if they hadn’t looked it up? I’m sorry (not really) but if you believe in an Almighty God that loves you and cares about you on a day to day basis, then why in the world do you look to what the alignment of the stars says based on your birthday? Someone help me out with this one because I just don’t get it. Horoscopes in general make no sense. To see a Christian repeatedly post their horoscope on Facebook makes me wonder what that person is thinking. When people ask me my sign from now on I answer a cross. That’s the only sign I need. So maybe right now you are a little offended by my statements and accusations. That’s fine with me. You grab your Bible. I’ll grab mine. Let’s see who ends up where. I’ll take standing up for God’s truth every time. I do hope, however, that maybe you are convicted by your use of these. Maybe it’s time for you to sit down with that Bible and read up about God. Discover who He is. Know the times He is there for us, in our side, speaking on our behalf. Know when Christ is interceding for us before God. Know that our plans are laid out by the Sovereign One, not the stars he placed in the sky. **This is not against those who don't claim Christ. If you believe your mojo, juju, thoughts, and what have you will make you feel better, so be it. This is for those who state they believe that Jesus died for their sins, through the power of God was raised from the dead, and lives eternally at the right hand of God interceding on our behalf (aka Christian). Lately I have not been feeling well. Heart racing, light headed, weak, and tired. If you know me, you know that scares the poop out of me. I'm strong and healthy. I get up at 5:00 and work, work, work! So a monkey wrench in my health doesn't do me well.
I believe I know where this comes from. This change of physical well being. Stress. I work well with stress. Give me a deadline, I'll get it done. Give me a challenge, I'll rise to the occasion. Give me a situation where I have no control over something hugely important to me, I shrivel and die. I'm a doer. I'm a girl who gets things done. I struggle to watch others sit idly by while they can do something. I don't understand why people outsource things that they can do themselves. Save a buck. Learn something new. Be proactive. I love weddings in my family. There's the whole set up thing, the beautiful service, the reception, and clean up time. When it is time to clean up that facility, anyone with the name (or maiden name) Larson is up and moving. What's that? You traveled 12 hours to get to the wedding? You're leaving in the morning first thing? Yup, you're at the reception hall cleaning up table cloths, food, floors, whatever needs to be done. It's just how it is. It's also one of my favorite traits of my family. My life is like that. It's a continual wedding night clean up. If something needs to get done, I'm on it. Over a week ago today was my "estimated ship date" given to me from the publishers, which was given to them by the printers. This ship date meant that 528 books packed into 22 boxes was going to make its way to my house. Two days ago the majority of my books, 17 boxes, left the printers facility. The last week has been so stressful for me. There was nothing more I could do but sit and wait. Okay, so maybe I harassed my contact person at Mascot Books. Sorry, Pam. I was left feeling so helpless. But no matter how many emails and phone calls were sent, it didn't make the printers move any faster. However, it did make the publisher contact the printers on a more personal note. That is how she found out there were books ready to go out just hanging around until they finished yearbook orders and would then get back to the rest of mine. This whole process has made me do a great deal of reflection. I could probably write a book just on the emotional rollercoaster of the process, but I want to focus on this last week. This past week has made me sit and be patient when I didn't want to do so. In this time of doing, there was nothing for me to get done. I had to let go and believe God when he told me it would all work out. There has been great frustration with all of this, and I can't say that it is all done. Even after the date got pushed back, we settled in to wait. When my publisher pushed the printers to get things moving, we were told they did, but left in the dark. The books shipped out Monday. I didn't receive a tracking number until this morning. In my mind it goes - I go to the post office. I send a package. I have a tracking number immediately. I share the number with the recipient through text message. Done.- That isn't the situation that we are dealing with here. This is a large freight shipment. There is a chance an 18 wheeler will be coming through my neighborhood to drop boxes at my door (total weight of 450 pounds). Sorry neighbors. So it takes a little longer for the shipping department to get things to the personnel that deals with my publisher. It makes sense. I was too anxious to think about the boxes. I mean, I have wondered how our mail carrier would get them all to me. I guess I didn't think it through. I caused stress and frustration that I didn't need to. The lesson of the day. The greater the frustration, the greater the joy. We know it's true. When we work hardest for things, we take more pride in them. But sometimes when we fight through the stress of the unknown, and learn to wait for longer, it also brings more joy. The books aren't here. They're 5 hours away in Atlanta. I'm still not sure how they are going to arrive, or what day or time. But I know they're there. It's okay for me to not know. It's okay for me to sit and rest in the fact that God said it will work out. I know that the moment those boxes come to my door will be such a time of joy and celebration, that I might forget all that stress. At the end of each day, I might remember the stress of parenting, tutoring, training, waiting. At the end of my life, I will remember the joy those stresses brought me. And boy is there a lot of it. (also, if the books aren't leaving ATL soon, I'll make my in-laws grab a couple of boxes and we can meet up. ) As I write this, my daughter is now a one year old. Well, one going on twelve. She is a very active child; running, climbing, exploring. She tests the limits and boundaries constantly. And in case I’ve missed all of this in my everyday caretaking of her, people are ready to tell me at a moment’s notice. “She’s a handful!” “That girl gets into everything!” “I don’t know how you get anything done with her.” Thank you, observers. I was looking for someone to tell me about my daughter. The best comments come from family members. They speak to me as if my daughter’s behavior is a punishment to me. “You were strong willed too, but not like this!” The voices chime. Okay, so you’re telling me that my daughter wanting to climb onto benches, open and close doors, and just try her hardest to do the things that her brother and parents do is bad? The only thing that shows me is how strong this young girl is. She teaches herself and works hard to do things that the people she looks up to do. My daughter is fearless. My daughter is strong, both physically and mentally. My daughter is resilient. At first, my reaction was very defensive. So what if she is strong willed, she still does what is asked of her. She may battle me over and over, but I’ve been strong willed for longer than she has. What’s the big deal if she wants to know her place, and to assert herself? Now fast forward. I’m finishing this project as my daughter will soon be three. This child is still just as strong, but it is working out just I figured it would. She is loving and kind. She apologizes quickly, when necessary. She forgives quickly. And she will stand up for herself, and her brother. This girl will challenge someone, when necessary. I look to the future often. I know that God will use both of my kids in big ways. Who knows when, where or how, but I know it’s coming. I have a feeling my daughter’s strength will have something to do with it. I feared having a daughter. I feared the pressures that she will face growing up. But by the time my daughter turned two, I knew things would be okay. She’ll stand up for herself. She’ll say no to the pressures that will approach her. There are plenty of times that I turn to Joshua to read the beginning. Joshua 1:6 – “Be strong and courageous…” Joshua 1:7 – “Only be strong and very courageous…” Joshua 1:9 – “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous!” Joshua 1:18 – “…; only be strong and courageous.” There are so many times I wish I was stronger. I wish I had more courage. I wish I could be bold and do the things I know needed to be done. God told Joshua to walk through other people’s camps. He told Joshua to go, proclaim, and take what was given. But he would not be able to unless he had strength and courage. Look, I’m thick headed. It takes a while for things to set in with me. But when the words “be strong and courageous” come up four times in 13 verses, I pay attention. You should too. So I look at my daughter. Fear escapes her. Weakness hides. She is not out of control or unruly. She is not disobedient or stubborn. I am working with her continually to use that strength. Maybe that’s you. Maybe you were a wild child. Fearless and strong willed. If that is who God made you to be, why would you be trained against it. Be strong and courageous. Walk through the enemy’s camp. Claim what is yours, by the hand of God. Being strong willed does not mean that you are on the wrong path. Being strong willed means you are the one making the path. Where is it that you have not been strong or courageous? Where have you not jumped out of the plane, all or nothing, into what you were called? This project you’re reading – this compilation of pieces I’ve written through the years, over a decade. Why do you think it has taken this long to write what I want and put it together? I didn’t have the courage. I didn’t have the strength to say what I wanted to say. That’s why I’m so thankful for a strong willed daughter. She taught me to be courageous and write. I’ll make my path where God has called me, despite the voices bringing me down. I hope you too will be strong and courageous to follow where God leads. Oh my gosh! Did you see it? Don't tell me you missed it. So you'll have to go back and find it. This person posted 3 simple moves to lose the under arm flab! Quick, go find it. Now!
Ok, don't. Be with me for a few more moments of your day. Why do we look at these? It's the same exercises over and over. And then what? So let's say you decide to do those moves. I can predict what will happen after 10 days of those 3 simple moves. That area of the body- under arm, aka triceps, the booty, the thighs, your abs- they get sore. You just worked the same muscle group over and over and over for 10 days. It's going to hurt. Then what? You might feel that muscle more. You may be able to poke it and know it's there. And finally, the fat and flab is still there. Huh? But it was supposed to take away my flabby arms. Guess we didn't read the fine print. With all the information available, why is so much crap still the reliable source? It just plain sucks. We need to seek the truth. We need to choose education. (This applies to all of life.) So let's talk some fitness education. You want to burn fat. Great. Let's do that! Do you watch your heart rate while you exercise? You might want to. There's actually a target heart rate (THR) zone to maximize your fat burning ability. That zone is 65-85% of your max heart rate (MHR). How do you find that? Easy. 220-age=MHR. To find your fat burning zone, multiply your MHR by .65 for the low side, then by .85 for the high side. Once you have found you THR zone, use it when you exercise. Try to get your heart rate in that zone to maximize fat burn. I know people hate running, but let's just be honest for a moment. Running helps people reach goals because it raises your heart rate into the fat burning zone. When you train and learn to be consistent, you can run and keep your heart rate in a fat burning zone for a long time and burn a great deal of calories with it. I'll call it the new craze, but really it's been around for decades and is just now getting recognition. HIIT workouts are bigger and better than ever. Every DVD has a HIIT workout these days. Why? What's the deal? Well, instead of endurance and consistency of running, the HIIT workouts are exactly what they claim - High Intensity Interval Training. Basically, you are doing harder work for a shorter time, with breaks and repetition. I've posted one on my site, and my clients and I are no strangers to the HIIT workouts. The beauty of HIIT workouts is that they last for a shorter time, usually 20 minutes. So then what? We engage in our fat burning exercises. We sweat, we burn, we bleed, we cry. Now we still need to put part two of our workout in. (Yes, cardio is only one part of the losing fat workouts.) We must add in strength training. This comes in a variety of ways. Those 3 quick and easy moves for flabby underarms are a part of it. You'll want to strengthen the entire body, not just the arms. This is where most people struggle. Many don't know what to do, how to do it, or where to start. Cute pins of a size 2 with 3lb dumbbells might work. I've posted at home workouts on the fitness page for no or one item. The gym can help. Personal trainers, like myself, are everywhere. But whether you are doing every variation of a push up in your living room or beefing up with the barbell, you need to add strength. Why? Okay, we want to burn fat. I thin that is obvious. When the fat melts off, you will want something there. Trust me on this one. You want ab muscles to be seen, but they won't be there if you don't build them. Those moves for sexy arms do nothing if fat still covers them, and fat coming off alone won't give you sexy arms. Guys, come on. Let's stop buying into these quick fixes. They don't help you get or stay healthy. I could write for days about quick fixes and diets. Being healthy is a lifestyle. We know that. It is said all the time. But for some reason, in our American-fast-must-have-it-now minds, we believe we can get healthy in 3 moves. Maybe if we quit buying into these things they will stop popping up on my feeds. You want 3 moves, here you go - do your cardio, do your strength training, eat right. |
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May 2023
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