When you read that title you think I'm going to hit some great joke, right? Sorry to disappoint. Just me and my ramblings of a blog trying to get life sorted out. My last post was about the hurricane approaching and the chaos that could ensue or the peace that can come. This is building on that a bit. We'll start with the run.
Sunday morning, my church was going live on Facebook because we couldn't use our facility. That meant I had a morning off on a Sunday. The whole week was weird to me with no "work," no school for Charlie, and rain. I decided a nice morning run was in order to finalize this crazy week. I consulted Charlie as to which route I should take and he sent me for the longest one...perhaps I should have thought about his motives on that. Oh well. Off I went. I do my best thinking when I'm running. My mind clears up and the important things come to mind. I started thinking about the hurricane and my peace with it and that's when God dropped a little nugget of knowledge in my head. There is a reason for why I stay so calm with storms. Let me dive in. First of all, I love weather and storms. I get so into it. However, being a mother, I need to let go of my storm tracker desires and focus on their safety. So when the talk of a hurricane coming towards the southeast hits my ear I begin to pray. My prayers are simple. Lord, do we go? I'm stubborn, and I found out I said the EXACT SAME WORDS AS MY FATHER. "You go, I need to stay in case something goes wrong. If I'm here to fix it there will be less damage." Go ahead. Face palm. Look, a 4 or 5 coming at my house, we're out. Bags packed. Papers taken. We are gone. 3 and under, I do some evaluating. I ask God, "Do we stay?" "Do we leave yet?" "Am I sending Charlie and the kids?" But here is the thing. I listen. In order to listen to God, you have to shut up. You have to take captive every thought - fear, worry, to do list, children - and truly listen. So far in hurricane history I have heard, "Stay." "You need to be strong for the kids, they're scared." "Stay." For this storm, I heard the voice of God say, "You'll be just fine." Every time, He's right! So last week when panicked people approached me, I stayed calm. I had peace. Not because of the weather man, which I was watching, but because every time Flo shifted, I was in prayer. Here's the thing that hit me while I was running - I'm an idiot. (You're welcome.) Not for the paragraph above am I an idiot, but because I don't apply the principles above to rest of my life. I used to love running because it was my time with God. The last few months I have felt less like my runs had the same prayer time. Today's run? I felt like I was back! My knee was killing me in the first mile and pain wanted to take me home. But then God's word, this word, hit my heart and I just kept going. Sometimes I feel like my life is the spaghetti model of the hurricane tracking. There are ten different paths. One far north, one far south, but the majority are there all squiggled together. That's when my prayers start off with, "God, help me." "What do I do?" "Please deal with this." "Will you take care of that?" "Bless me, please, I need it." And then I run away in a hurricane frenzy. I don't stop to listen. What would my life look like if I just stopped and listened in prayer for His answer? That's when I realized the next piece. Sometimes I don't stop to listen because the kids need me or I have to run out to a client or life, life, life. When the storm comes I stop and listen because I need to know what to do for my family. I'm not being a selfish twit. I have peace in my prayers because I'm willing to stop and listen for them. When it has to do with my work, our finances, my stress, the school, I'm thinking about me. I don't stop and listen. Don't get me wrong, I have had plenty of times that I realize I need to stop and sit at His feet to just be with Him and listen. But I think I'm safe in saying that the majority of times my life is throwing gale force winds, I'm moving without listening. So where does the card game come in? Well, eight miles gives me a lot of thinking time (I'm not that fast). On the journey back, with this wisdom imparted I started to think about how I need to reorder my life. I do this often with my to do lists. Do I play for points or potential? What does that mean? Well, Charlie and I play Cribbage, a card game with a wooden board. My grandparents taught me, my brother and grandmother also play. It's one of my favorite parts of Christmas and family gatherings. Sometimes we just sit and play with a piece of pie by our sides. In this game, you are dealt six cards. You must discard two into the crib. The crib will be played later in the hand by whoever dealt the hand. As you are discarding your two cards, you must keep in mind that there will be a turn card, and whether or not the crib is yours. There are many factors, and as much of it is a game of luck, there is some strategy to it. I will often ask Charlie if I should play for points or potential. What that means is that I may have six to eight points keeping a certain group of four card, but I have the potential for ten or twelve points if I give up that four and hold a different four. I have a tendency to do that with my to do lists. If I take care of all the little junk, I have more things checked off. Six points guarenteed. Or I can stop rushing with the little things and pour myself into something that will take a little longer, but the result will be fourteen points. That's IF I can make it happen. In my life, I often play for points. Sitting and listening to God means waiting, resting, stopping. It's playing the potential. The hurricane is shown on the radar, I play potential 100% of the time. I stop and listen. I'm learning the valuable lesson that I need to have the same peace of God in my everyday life that I have during a hurricane.
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May 2023
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