I know I've talked about it before with people, but I figured I would touch on it again.
There are two types of people in this world. There are those that live for Halloween and those that could not care any less. If you don't know me well, I'll let you know that I'm in the second group. I don't really care about Halloween. For me, the only thing I grew up caring about was getting some sweet candy. I wanted pounds of sugar to course through my veins. I still do. It's my addiction. It's my coping mechanism. But from childhood until now, the only thing I care about is getting candy. I've spoken with many people about the holiday over the years. One thing I have heard over and over again is that they love to dress up. They love to take a night (or multiple nights) and become someone else. I guess I can see the appeal in that. It can be fun to be someone else for a time being. But there are a lot of people like myself. I understand why many people don't like Halloween - destruction of property, mischief night, demons, devils, gory movies, etc. As much as I don't care for those things, I think it is my disinterest in becoming someone else. For me, most of my life is an act. I spent many years hiding my depression and anxiety. I spend my days pretending I'm not in pain. I have had more times of being somebody else than being me. So if I put on a costume of a doctor, am I me dressing up like a doctor or is the pretend me dressing up like a doctor? That question alone leads me such an anxiety ridden paralysis. And I don't think I'm alone in that. I think there are more and more people struggling with that question. There are quite a few of us that are tired of pretending to be someone else. We wear a mask on Tuesday when we go into our meeting. We put on a mask on Friday to go out with our friends. There's a mask on Saturday when we want to lay in bed but the kids want us up and out doing fun things. For a lot of us, Halloween is just exhausting.
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AuthorI have a lot to say about a lot of things. Archives
May 2023
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